Before I became a mother, I was kind of like a bit of dandelion fluff, going wherever my life would take me (how's that for cliche?). I didn't really care what I was doing, and I certainly didn't have a purpose for my life. I just cared about the now, not the future. I was in every sense an irresponsible, selfish brat. Now I'm just a brat.
When Robbie and I found out we were expecting (rather unexpectedly, I might add), there were many thoughts that ran through my mind. From absolute fear to then excitement to extreme love, my emotions ran the gamut. I loved every wiggle and kick and stretch and hiccough that the baby made, and we anxiously anticipated the birth of our new family member. We hit the jackpot, I must say.
At this time, four years ago, I was pacing up and down the hallways of the delivery ward, nervous as all get out, and so ready to DO THIS. Roughly nine hours later, a squirmy, screaming, human freaking being came out of ME and was very much here and real. It was amazing!
We watched her grow over the four years into what she is now, a really, really awesome little person who cares very much for others and demands kisses and hugs and snuggles up when we're watching TV and makes jokes that we don't get, but are hilarious nonetheless. This past year, she's done everything from chopped off all her hair:
to gone to Disneyland:
to splashed in the Atlantic:
to learning to tie her shoes and spell her name! While the physical differences are not great, she sure has grown up.
And I've been growing right alongside her. I am far more confident in my ability to raise a good person. I am so sure that empowerment is the answer to success, and unconditional love is the key to happiness. I have a direction now, and it's a good one.
Just as I can compare Elodie today to Elodie four years ago, I can compare me today to me before Elodie and realize that I am a far better person, not because I'm older, but because Elodie is.
Many, many, many happy returns to the person who changed my whole life and steered me in the right direction.